Thanksgiving

When I think of Thanksgiving I think of Grandma's house. My Grandma was a better cook than your Grandma. Her Oyster Dressing was better than your Grandma's Oyster Dressing, that is if your Grandma even had the guts to try making Oyster Dressing. Everything was awesome. Grandma and my memories of Thanksgiving are why I rate Thanksgiving right behind Christmas as my favorite holiday of the year.

One especially memorable Thanksgiving (you will see why in a minute) took place during those years when I was too old not to be useful but still too young to be trusted with anything of value or importance. Grandma was making dinner and it was almost ready. The family who had gathered that day were milling around in the family room (where the TV was) which was only steps from the dining room. My job, handed down by Grandma herself, was to announce that Thanksgiving was ready and it was time to go to the table. After much anticipation the time arrived. Grandma gave me the nod and off I went.

"Thanksgiving is ready. Come sit down", I announced to the gathered family in a fashion that I remember was much like the guy who announces the President when he/she enters the Senate for the State of the Union. Unlike the guy who does the announcing, nobody seemed to either hear me or care. Everybody sat there unfazed by this very important news. Thanksgiving was ready. Perhaps they didn't totally understand what that meant. The Oyster Dressing was ready. The Turkey was ready. Even that Cranberry Sauce still in its canned molding was ready. Nobody moved.

I tried again. "Thankgiving is ready. Come sit down." It was like I was wasn't there. "Thanksgiving is ready. Come sit down", I tried again. And again. And again. Finally I walked over to the bar that opened into the kitchen and shot Grandma one of those "its not working - HELP" looks. "Its ready", she said loud enough to be heard from the kitchen but not nearly loud as I had been proclaiming. You can guess what happened.

When everyone was gathered at the table, but before they sat down I sensed my moment to actually complete the task set before me. "Everyone sit down", I once again proclaimed in my be-heard voice. Once again nobody sat down. "Everybody sit down", I said for maybe the fourth time. Nothing. It was at this point that I remembered something I saw on TV.

When people on TV wanted to be heard and do so with dramatic emphasis they would spell out the important word. "I L-O-V-E love you" & "Get out! O-U-T out!" and the like. Turns out you need to be able to spell in order to garner the desired effect. Turns out I didn't know how to spell sit. I gave it my best shot. Turned out to be the trick to getting attention.

"Everybody sit down. S-H-I-T down. Sit down." The word "sit" has no "H" in between the "S" and the "I". I had everybody's attention now. Yet nobody was sitting; mostly they were staring. Then came the yelling. I am not sure I did an adequate job defending my ignorant outburst but to my credit I have always been a turibble speller.

Now that I am older, I look back on those times with a fair amount of perspective. As a kid Thanksgiving equaled the meal. Thanksgiving was about eating, something that could happen with or without other people. Thanksgiving was about Oyster Dressing, Turkey, Cranberry Sauce. People were like those goofy paper hats they put on the ends of the Turkey legs; they might have added something but not in any real way. Maybe that is why I remember proclaiming "Thanksgiving is ready" and nobody getting up to run to the table. Thanksgiving was about what was happening in the family room: family gathered, laughing and joking around, telling stories, and watching TV together. The real "feast" had nothing to do with Turkey and Oyster Dressing.

I am away from my family again this Thanksgiving. My brother in Oklahoma and my parents in California. I long for a table for all of us to gather around. My wife's parents and grandparents will join Kate and I in Columbus on Thursday. Around that table with Kate, with Steve and Barbara, with Grandfather and Othenia, I imagine a table big enough for the WHOLE family and am immensely thankful for the one I will soon share with them. Thanksgiving Day carves out a space to recognize that despite the distance, we remain in the family room laughing and having a good time purposefully ignoring the call to a table we are unable to share.

Happy Thanksgiving!